"Ashley I'm going to win this competition, I say I'm going to win this competition."
Fred Elliot, Eastender

"Oh God, I've locked up the Cambridge University Main-Frame processing my entries."
Stephen Hawking, Brain Box

"I've got Eileen Drewry's seaweed helping me with my entries."
Glen Hoddle, Empty Box

"I'm taking this competition very seriously and have now 'researched' all teams up to S.
Can anybody introduce me to the manager of Tunisia?"
Ulrika Jonsson, 'Whether or Not' Girl

"10 million man years of work by the Microsoft corporation is finally justified by this competition."
Bill Gates, Futurologist

"I will be insufferable if I don't win this competition."
Eamon Holmes, GMTV Anchor

"The main reason for me doing an expose of the sub-culture of Internet Predict-the-Score competitions was to avoid people like Paul Daniels. "
Louis Theroux, Wierdo

"I shouldn't really say, but Alan is choosing his scores by alternately spinning tubes of foot cream and dandruff preparation."
A loyal and discreet secretary, Norwich

"I'm really fed-up. I'm going to have to stop talking for 15 seconds in order to fill out the entry form."
Jonathon Woss, TV Celeb